Apple Butter & Annisms

I work in a nursing home. I have to say that not one single day is ever the same, there are no dull moments and contrary to popular belief, we laugh a lot. You should also know that most of our days are planned around some sort of food. Yesterday, we planned for today to be apple butter and biscuits--and that's exactly what we had. My darling friend Ann, who is one of the nursey nurses (as I like to call them)  has a place at a lake not too far away. Her neighbor had an abundant apple tree. She texted the neighbor and asked if she could pick some apples. He said "pick away" and she did. She's been making apple butter for days. She's filled up 3 cases of jars and all the random empty ones she had. We got biscuits (those freezer kind that are really tasty) and she brought the apple butter along with some real sweet cream butter. All I can say is.....heaven on a paper plate!! Biscuits....good. Apple butter....fabulous!!! She truly does spoil us and I know for a fact that she has added at least 20 lbs. to my ass since we started working together. She's also the one who told me how to make sweet cream biscuits. OMG. And, she makes a mean pot of butter beans. Just sayin'.

Then, there are the "Annisms". That's all I know to call them. Not many of her "sayings" have been heard before although she swears she doesn't make them up. A few have worked their way into my repertoire and people usually just sort of look at me quizzically, but they don't just fall out laughing like we do when she just casually drops one of her little pearls of wisdom upon us. There are way too many to remember off the top of my head and list, but here's a few of my favorites....

"Holy crap on a cracker!"
"You look like you've been hit in the ass with a dead rabbit"
"Rougher than a peanut patty on the goober side"


I'll add some more when I think of them.

She's one in a million--our little Annie.